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Rude SMS
☻Roses
are red, violets are blue, I was born smart &
handsome, but what the hell happend to you?
T☻his
sms can only be readed by someone SEXY:...try
again...again...maybe you are just not
sexy?...one more time...hey don't force it
ugly!!!
☻How
about you sit on my lap and we'll talk about the
first thing that pops up?
☻Hi,
I am an alien and I'm checking for some chicks
in your phonebook.. Searching.. Searching..
Searching.. Sorry,no chicks found! Gay?
Conclusion: You Are Gay
☻How
women think about sex:At 8 ignore it,Age 18
experience it,Age 28 look 4 it,Age 38 ask 4
it,Age 48 beg 4 it,Age 58 pay 4 it,Age 68 pray
it,Age 78 4get it
☻3
monkeys escaped from the zoo ... one was caught
watching tv ... another playing football and the
third one was caught reading this txt message
☻Today
its cool to have small cars and small
computers.Soon it will be cool to have a small
penis too.then you my friend will be THE MAN!!
☻Are
you free tonight, or will it cost me? I'm new in
town, can you give me directions to your flat?
☻Your
network tariff has changed! Call charges are now
calculated according to brain size. The smaller
the cheaper! Congrats You can make free calls!
☻How
Dogs and Women are alike?
Neither believe that silence is golden,
Neither can balance a checkbook &
Both put too much value on kissing.
☻If
I were to
make a dictionary
CUTE=you
SWEET=you
THOUGHTFUL=you
GOOD LOOKING=you
GORGEOUS=you
LIAR=me!
☻I
bet when u go 2 de zoo u have 2 buy 2 tickets
1 to get in & another to get out
☻If
ever I was rude to u,
If ever I was angry with u,
If ever I misbehaved with u,
then don’t hesitate,
JUST SLAP
yourself
☻One
out of four people is a chinese. If your father,
your mother and your brother are not Chinese, it
must be you.
☻Make
love to ur girlfriend on Valentine day.
She’ll give u good news on Mothers day &
U’ll have a child on children`s day.
Don’t try this on everybody.
Coz U’ll have bad news on Dec 1
☻You
don't know the meaning of the word "fear" - but
then again you don't know the meaning of most
words.
☻“LOVE”
.What a heavenly thing, what a heavenly word….
but do u know what is LOVE?
L= Loss
O= Of
V= Valuable
E= Energy….
So don’t LOVE..
☻Dear
God, thank you for making me healthy. Can you
also make me sexy? If you can't make me sexy,
please make all my friends fat. Amen.
☻Old
people used to annoy me at weddings by pinching
my cheeks &
saying that you are the next.
They stopped doing that when I started doing the
same to them at funerals!!
☻Dear
God, thank you for making me healthy. Can you
also make me sexy? If you can't make me sexy,
please make all my friends fat. Amen.
☻A
child uses its thumb 2 chew,
an illiterate uses his thumb 2 sign,
a winner uses his thumb 2 show victory,
but a monkey is using his thumb 2 read this sms
☻Wat's
the diff between pulling a curtain and a panty?
ANS: When U pull a curtain, it means tat the
show is over but when u pull a panty the show
begins..
☻Today
is the birthday of Donald Duck..
Wish him happy birthday and send this
sms to every cartoon as i did…..
☻Can
we do romance in the evening today?
I’m in a good mood
Just a little bit of kissing and biting
reply me soon!
urs lovingly
“MOSQUITO”
☻A
man said 2 his doctor 'everytime I look in the
mirror I get an erection' the doctor said
'That's because u look like a cunt!
☻Roses
are red,
Violets are blue,
Sugar is sweet,
And so are you.
But the roses are wilting,
The violets are dead,
The sugar bowl’s empty,
And so is your head.
☻“CONGRATS”
U have been awarded an M.B.A degree
For not Smsing me.
MBA means ‘Member of Bhikari Association’
Kindly forward it 2 all M.B.A’s.
☻When
I was young I begged God for a bike, but God
does not work that way... so I stole a bike and
begged for forgiveness!
☻If
ever in your life u r very sad n feel that u
have lost everything,
I'll come, hold ur hand,
take u 4 walk on a bridge and show u where 2
jump from.
☻Nature
is a miracle. One million years ago no one knew
people would wear glasses but our ears are at
the right spot
☻Kiss's
r blown + kiss's r wasted kiss's rnt kiss's
unless they r tasted, kiss's spread germz +
germz hated, so kiss me BABE im vacinated!
☻Sorry!
Your birth certificate is an apology letter from
the condom factory.
☻There
is hot sex, fast sex, group sex, safe sex,
leather sex, telephone sex and for people wid a
face like urs theres.............masturbation
☻From
Moon to Sun, From Jan To Dec,
From birth till my death, my feelings 4 u
have never changed.
For me, you’ve always been…
a headache !
☻Can
u pronounce good english:- read along woof,
roof, loof, shoof, shoof, woof, loof, roof,
poof, woof woof, hoof, woof, roof, shoof.
Test results: U r a good dog. Now stop barkin
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